Pole Dancing Through Maternal Bonds

Due to hyper sexualization and harsh criticism of women, specifically black women, this video and many others like it, have stirred some controversy on the internet. Despite some criticism, we at Pussy Magic have reveled in the beautiful sense of motherhood that is portrayed. Instead of seeing this as a sexualization of womanhood via pole dancing, we prefer to view it as an intimate expression of a mother bonding, exercising, and having fun with her baby girl. While any woman would likely be criticized for this act, I am certain black women receive harsher criticisms in general, but particularly in the realms of motherhood and sexuality. Because of this, this particular woman has been judged more harshly than her white counterpart would be. We are here to praise the beauty we found and felt within this video.

When I first viewed this video I was moved by the apparent bond that the mother and daughter shared. It's clear to see that this child is a mirror of her mother's self-love, confidence and comfortability in her own skin. Studies show that a girl's relationship with her mother has a big impact on perception of self. It says our body image is formed over a long process beginning at birth. Stating that, in addition to our maternal connection, our self-esteem and body image is formed through media, peers, and an overall cultural perception of the ideal body. I see this mother nurturing every part of her daughter and exuding carefree Black Girl Magic. More and more we are seeing black mothers take back what feels like the world trying so hard to take from them. We [black women] are returning to our roots of freedom and being the magic that we are and always have been. In return, healing and releasing blockages that flow through the womb line by fearlessly expressing ourselves and living in our truth.

Their dancing and hyping one another in the beginning was like watching a mini team pre-game. The way the girl giggles as she spins around with her mother shows that she has no distorted view of what’s going on. She’s merely bonding with Mommy. Imagine how safe she must feel in her mother’s arms as she isn’t afraid or crying, but laughing and squealing almost the entire time, enjoying every moment of the ride. If only we could all maintain a child’s perspective when it came to certain things in life.

I was also amazed by this mother’s strength. The way she transitioned from move to move with such ease, a skill already tricky to do on your own, was majestic. There’s a moment when she leans back almost like a surfboard still carrying her baby. My abs still hurt from watching that move! Pole dancing can also be a truly great form of exercise. It's been long-proven that working out on a daily basis improves your mood and is a natural energy booster. Not to mention that it can be fun and done in various ways!

While I enjoyed the clear balance of masculine and feminine energy, it was the feminine energy that stole the show for me. The nurturing and intuitive flow in the dance was divine. I loved the way she moved swiftly and softly. This mother unapologetically showed up with divine feminine energy. Feminine energy being a softer more fluid energy, it flows with ease.

Through her own balance, self-assurance, and self-love, she teaches her daughter at a very young age that she is the only one who decides what she does and doesn't do with her body, regardless of society's patriarchal views on how a woman "should" behave.

Tell us!: What about this video inspired and touched you? How does it relate to your own definition of motherhood?


Indigo is an intuitive empath, spiritualist, and healer who enjoys uplifting and encouraging her community of wombyn through conversation, tarot, empathy, & sisterhood. She writes poetry and conjures herbal skincare products in her spare time. Indigo resides in the Bay Area of California.

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